Cruel and Unusual Punishments
by Dirty Dirtbags
Summary: Well this is a funny fic that me and two of my friends wrote. It 's a bit rude towards the beginning but it's really funny and yeah. Just read and reveiw please.


They all walked into the classroom to realise that Snape hadn't entered yet. It was unusual for him to be late but that did not occur to any of them because they were just enjoying the moment of class without Snape. Just then Dumbledore walked in and told them to…  
  
…sit down and take out their books.  
  
"Professor Snape is unable to come to the lesson today. I want you all to write an essay on the Wolfsbane Potion. You may start now. Mr. Malfoy and Ms. Granger can I please see you outside?"  
  
Draco got up and crossed the room in one stride, not bothering to help the mudblood as she fell over. He watched as she muttered an "I'm okay." To Potter and Weasley before stepping outside.  
  
"Well," Dumbledore began, his eyes twinkling in excitement, "I have special news for you."  
  
Draco glanced down the hallway. Anything Dumbledore got excited about couldn't be good. He just happened to catch site of a Weasley. Easily distinguished by her flaming red hair. The youngest one…now what was her name? Georgia? No that wasn't it. Jennifer? Ginny? Ah yes. Ginny.  
  
"Mr. Malfoy?" Dumbledore asked, tearing Draco from his thoughts  
  
"Professor…  
  
…I was just…" Explained Draco.  
  
"I know exactly what you were doing." Said Dumbledore.  
  
"And what is that Professor?" Asked Draco.  
  
"Undressing that innocent poor girl with your dirty mind. You should be ashamed of yourself." Said Dumbledore.  
  
"But Professor it isn't what it looks like. Let me explain!"  
  
"Don't 'but Professor' me, young man." Said Dumbledore, "I'll be seeing you this afternoon naked so Ms. Weasley can see you. See how it feels. Malfoy!"  
  
"Yes Sir."  
  
"In fact. Miss Granger I would like you to come as well."  
  
"But Professor."  
  
"No buts. I will see you both at 5.00. Now Professor Snape has been working on an antidote for the poisonous potion Bigamous. Do you understand?"  
  
"Yes Sir." The mudblood answered.  
  
Draco who was silent was watching the mudblood. He was trying to imagine what she would look like naked.  
  
"You are dismissed."  
  
Hermione walked over to Draco.  
  
"I know what your thinking and I want you to show you so come with me to my prefects room."  
  
"What?" Draco exploded, "Ewww!"  
  
"What are you on Malfoy?" Hermione asked, looking at Draco.  
  
"Dope."  
  
"Oh, look I don't plan on showing up tonight." Hermione said.  
  
"Oh so what you're going to like, not listen to a professor?"  
  
"No. I'm just not going to go."  
  
"Why?" Draco asked.  
  
"I don't want to see you or Ginny naked thanks."  
  
"I can't believe Dumbledore's doing this."  
  
"Yeah, I now what's he on…?"  
  
"Dope, I'm the supplier." Draco smiled.  
  
"Well, I'm going back to class." Hermione said.  
  
"I can't wait till this afternoon. Ginny all for me to look and feel." Said Draco trying to come to earth from his pornographic mind.  
  
"I wouldn't actually mind looking at McGonagall naked. I always dream of her bending down to pick up a pencil right in front of my desk, in transfiguration,  
  
so I could lift up her dress and start to pump inside of her."  
  
"DRACO MALFOY! You are one self-righteous pig but you are so right, we should get together sometime. Maybe we could invite Filch along, you propose the idea to McGonagall, and owl me. I'll ask Filch"  
  
"O.K Hermione."  
  
Draco leant over to kiss Hermione, and she took the opportunity to drag him into the room, and they stared to undress as they kissed passionately.  
  
"Draco!" She said, "What are you thinking?"  
  
"I'm thinking about how we shouldn't be doing this."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"cause I barely know you, and I don't know about my feelings for Ginny either."  
  
"Draco, that's the problem with you, you think too much." She kissed him.  
  
"Stop trying to kiss me into silence!"  
  
"huh?"  
  
"Stop! Stop! Hermione, Stop!"  
  
~*~*~  
  
Crabbe stared at Draco as he woke.  
  
"Whatsamatter Draco?" Crabbe asked stupidly  
  
"What do you mean, 'what's the matter?"  
  
"Well, you were calling for Hermione and I was wondering why."  
  
"Why would I be calling for that awful mudblood?"  
  
"I dunno." Crabbe said.  
  
"No, nor do i." Draco said, rolling over in his bed. "I just had the weirdest dream…"  
  
"You did? Was it one of them, "Crabbe/Malfoy" ones…I love them…"  
  
  
  
THE END! 


End file.
